I am starting a form a of therapy that some will not approve of...but I have spoken to a person who has been highly recommended to do this. In order for it to be successful I need to remove certain elements from this blog (and other places that I have kept information just in case). I am going to do "Memory Wash" hypnosis. I have been told that it will erase my memory of the events that happened and the person I want to forget. I will still have certain emotional scars, but the pain from them will be alleviated and I won't really know where they came from. It should make me more confident and back to my outgoing personable self. I am not a big fan of forgetting things, but I really am not a big fan of locking myself away either. The pain, feelings of worthlessness, and fear are not going away and it has been about a year. This is just a more proactive then talk therapy.